The Lie I Told Myself After Leaving Corporate (And What It Cost Me)

Leaving the corporate world felt like breaking up with an ex who never quite saw me. I gave them a polite goodbye and a ‘It’s not you, it’s me’. Turns out there was more to the story than I originally realized.

I stepped away with my head held high. They even threw me a party to thank me for nearly 10 years with them — a serious tenure at a Fortune 131 company. To anyone around me, I looked the part: self-actualized, mindful, even graceful.

When I left, I promised myself I'd "do things differently". I swore off hustle culture and all the toxic masculinity vibes baked into corporate structures. I told myself I was no longer available for that frequency.

But here’s what I couldn’t see at the time: I had simply built a prettier cage.

I’d created a moat for my righteousness to hide behind—and I called it "evolution."

The Big Lie

Here’s the punchline that took me years (and a few burnouts) to realize:

Nothing is inherently anything.

The corporate world wasn’t inherently toxic… any more than my new “intuitive” and “aligned” way of doing business was inherently right.

The missing ingredient?
Self-leadership.

Self-leadership isn’t a buzzword. It’s a way of life. And frankly, it’s the path to becoming unfu*kwithable in business and in life.

It asks, in every situation:

“How am I creating this?”

It’s not about blame. It’s about power.

Because if you played a part in building it, then you hold the key to changing it.

The Shift: From Newton to Einstein (Yeah, We’re Going There)

Self-leadership trades Newtonian thinking (cause-and-effect, black-and-white) for something more nuanced—more… Einsteinian.

“Newtonian thinking is linear and cause-effect based. Einsteinian thinking plays with energy, perception, and the relativity of experience.”

Neither is better. But let me tell you—life and business get a hell of a lot more fun when you learn to say yes, and instead of choosing sides in every conversation.

I’ve seen it in my life. In my clients’ lives. In women entrepreneurs shifting from overachieving survival mode to thriving from a grounded, regulated place.

When you stop labeling things as good or bad, right or wrong—you unlock a new level of creative and energetic freedom.

This Isn’t Just Philosophy. It’s Strategy.

Sales, marketing, and operations matter. But if you don’t know how to lead yourself from a regulated AF nervous system… even the best business strategy will deliver subpar results.

Let’s get honest: self-leadership is the foundational strategy most female entrepreneurs are skipping. And it’s the very thing that moves you from building under pressure… to building from power.

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